Questions and Musings for the Start of 2018 + Come Into Existence


Come Into Exstence.jpg

 

I always started mapping out my dreams, goals and aspirations and going back from the theme — always by the end of the year. It was the theme of Bless This Mess for 2016, wherein I look back into it, I had a line of “To create a mess and not be sorry for it”, which was the following text after the artwork I have created for the year.

It has given me shivers down my spine and now as I look back to the post and read it out loud again– like that, 2017 flew by so quickly like a whirlwind!

As I look through my successes and failures and everything in between, I had looked at it in a more purposeful manner through journal writing which I have started to commit myself by the month of June. It was the year that I integrated self-care because I have hit my rock bottom taking in consideration the different aspects and sudden changes that I had to adapt to— emotional changes and factors.

Self-care, pause and conquer where the 3 words that were definitely constant.

How about you?

What were the 3 constant things that you did to pace yourself through your activities? Write down the 3 words that resonate with you.

“Conquer” is a big word for me that has made me push through and be honest with myself as well as the mindset I used to help out others I on their work– whether a quick check or a long heart-to-heart talk, it was always the word that made me hopeful for whatever the outcome of a certain project would be, an academic challenge, me being sick or kind of stuck in a rut, helping out a friend and shutting down inner demons. I also aim to conquer my battle with my heightened anxieties from last year and as well have a better relationship with anxiety, meaning I should be at peace with my thoughts whether good or bad and not avoiding them nor letting them root into my mind.

What did I learn from this year?

It was the year I struggled the most with completing day-to-day tasks and when I looked back at it — adding too much structure in my work and unnecessary (added) pressure on myself to complete works without or considering little downtime to cool pieces and things down affected me so much.

Having the needed breather to “feel” and to connect with my emotions, why’s and writing down to be grateful was putting thought clouds into tangible pieces– like that of a journal. A lot of things have helped me connect and has given me reminders –Beautiful people have guided me in different way this years (like that of guardian angels) and has made me reflect and slow down through my process and goal throughout the year.

Below is the list of providers for art, challenges, prompts and content that have kept me sane in my own nutshell: I highly recommend you give them a follow, a view on their sites and a view of what they have to offer:

Sofia Cope – The Mad Muse 

Screenshot 2018-01-16 10.36.45.png

Sofia Cope is one of the lovely co-creators who share my same values towards art. My values for art and process— respecting it, not perfecting it, is one of the reminders to myself when I feel too worn out to work on it in the first place. I love how I slow down with her online art challenges which has helped me to grow and expand my thoughts and skill on Collage art and now integrating it to my existing visual art and writing (here on my blog of course).

The latest challenge is Adjourn 2017 — created with a fellow creative, Apple Nocom of MOONGIRL. Adjourn is a 5-day writing prompt and challenge to wrap up the year through journal writing (which I was only able to finish earlier this month due to my sickness and downtime to recover).

My Adjourn 2017 Entries

Day 1

Screenshot 2018-01-14 23.08.24.png

Day #1 with my #Adjourn2017 Entry (since I got sick with dengue and still am recovering 😷😴)

This year in a larger view is one of the most challenging to me mentally — thus the self-care routine and things I needed to do to cope with my heightened anxieties, which in turn has affected my personal art, outlook and work. But with grace + hope + trust from above, I was still able to create more wonderful things and prove to myself 👏 I 👏 could 👏and 👏will👏achieve 👏 whatever the heck I want as long as I put my love + time + patience + prayers into it ❤️

Sinking in my own thoughts, but being my own cheerleader (along with the love and care of the core people I love and support me), I will always come strong 💪 A year always comes as a whirlwind — one full of turns and twists.
Another year to be kinder to myself, and finally get my groove and game to whatever my heart desires and where I needed to be.

Day 2

Re-experiencing: Day 2 of #Adjourn2017 

💫 I remember a very vivid memory of me strolling at the beach and very soft and strong colors of the beach felt like it was familiar. I always loved the cool colors. It made me feel at home. The waves seemed violent and then calm as they crash. Nothing fancy, but it was really beautiful for me. 🌊

 

Day 3

Adjourn 3.png

Tears : Day 3 of #Adjourn2017
I remember the days I’m at my lowest did consist of me sitting down slowly and breaking down in tears, suddenly turning int

o rapids, raging fire, questions and eventually, they’ll turn into ashes. It was consistent, not for the same reasons, but for different ones and sometimes even without one.

I felt the strongest when I would calm down after and accept the fact that I crashed— it was a way of picking up the pieces and cleaning up the dirt after the storm. I’ll cling to hope and faith and dive into my feelings, into my own pool of tears like I was expecting it. 💦🌊 Acceptance of my weakness and what a situation for what it is, was the best feeling ever.

And the rest of tumbling, turning, balancing and thinking I got it figured out, and suddenly tripping over again,m— it was normal, that is life surprising you, in a cycle, indefinite. And the rest is history 💫✨ Congratulations to self and to you (the person reading this), it’s a new page and a new slate— day 4 of 365 🌞👋💃

Day 4

Adjourn 4.png

Naked: Day 4 #Adjourn2017

What really affected and had me struggling the most is the feeling during one day, when I did a ton of artworks and a feeling of UNCERTAINTY (in one of the aspect of my life), I was sitting on the regular on the floor busy pinning, sketching, thinking about my feelings and emotions (since I put high regard on them especially for picking up and determining an important tug in the heart to create— a reason to create) And I really felt kind of hollow on the inside on what I really wanted to process first and sometimes this feeling crept inside me and always would shame me whenever I thought one work out of the bunch was “irrelevant” , “repetitive” or least important under the list I was completing. It was a constant feeling of weakness I had in 2017 that I now have to battle this year.

Looking back to the years when I created most art that made me the happiest were the ones from 2012-2016, the feelings of inhibition were unknown— I hope the regain that spirit in my works again to strengthen a foundation in me — that consists of self-awareness and self-esteem.

To bare myself is always a hurting act to do but when I think about it, thinking thoughts like these do not exist will lead to the thought taking a more massive toll on my process. It pays to be honest with oneself, to slow down and love yourself more tenderly. 💕

Day 5

Adjourn 5 wo letters.pngTime : Day 5 of #Adjourn2017

What I want to change for the first quarter of my 2018 is the timeline I make for myself. ⏰ I’d like to isolate my personal timeline from all of the distractions, information and all the peer pressure that might be surrounding me— this I aim to do by slowing down on different aspects. ✨

After all of the madness that the end of 2017 has shown me— a rough patch in relationships, a slow down time to heal from my dengue (which had me having so much running in my mind), plethora of ideas flooding me like a wave while I couldn’t do much when I was sick and now returning to my groove. 🌙🌿 Time is what I will bend this first quarter— to keep my calm even after not hitting the targets and do everything else. Sleep, breathe, do whats necessary and wake up to another day ✨💫🌻

“You have all the time you need in your own timeline, baby”.

 

Day 6

Screenshot 2018-01-14 23.10.16Screenshot 2018-01-14 23.10.22

Biscuit Packaging, Paper Scrap I printed on, Corrugated Board Excess from Projects ✨🌿💫

My Armoury : Day 6 of #Adjourn2017 

I will bring with me my 3 greatest tools for combat, vision and creating: 🗡⚔️

1.)My love for and contact with Humanity — keeping people who love me, support me and are close to my heart. Keeping their words and stories as reminders to move forward no matter what. 💃👯‍♀️

2.)My willpower and my faith — looking forward to a bigger idea of the world and what I can give back to the universe as it gifts me resources, creativity and a lot more tools, more than enough for this lifetime.


🌏💫✨ 3.)My purpose — to create something inspiring, beautiful and worthwhile. To know myself better, to give back to the universe and to love. 🌿

Arriane Serafico – Purposeful Creative – Dare to Share IG Challenge and Braver 2018

Screenshot 2018-01-16 10.36.31.png

Since I’m putting up with my upcoming thesis (which hopefully I will be completing by the end of this semester), I have all focus on it and would rather start my own braver goals for after.

But if you need guidance especially on goal setting and creative business questions, queries or information, Arriane’s Purposeful Creative blog + Braver Goals e-course is for you. I’ve been using one of her free e-courses at the moment to navigate through my admin work (a.k.a finances, budgeting + technical things ) at the moment and I’ve gained new insights and this feeling of excitement towards it.

If you need a big push towards your ideas, I will never not recommend how she presents everything to creatives like me — simple and fun.

Girl boss Media – Blog and Daily Quotes

Screenshot 2018-01-16 10.54.51.png

I may not be updated with the series nor anything else on Netflix (haha), but I get my daily dose of Girlboss articles in my inbox always. Always included in my lists of books and reads for the day– a perfect thing to read to educate myself with just when the day ends.

________________________________________

 

As for the things I have learned, I’d like to list down the Top 3 reminders for this coming year:

1.) Know your working habits — slow down if you need to and let the world breathe, a downtime.

I have been guilty for so many times that I must say no to a lot of things, and this year, I have refused many opportunities because it was definitely one the things that made me respect my process and the quality of my work and of course, keep my focus on the task at hand. The year had a lot of hits and misses and those misses usually were the result of me being a sponge — me absorbing my learnings and new things that might bring me new ideas (which I continue to be this coming year).

2.) Love more and spend more time.

The most tender moments of the time of year was being with loved ones and totally blocking time without phones or unnecessary or excessive use of social media. I have told myself and promise myself to continue a habit of blocking time that has helped me come contact with my physical surroundings and small details of what the eye can see.

3.) Always be thankful.

Gratefulness brings more ideas and focus on what exists and for me, it brings inspiration. For the frustrations, write them downs reflect and use that idea to

What was your top 3 reminders for yourself?

After running through a list of your success and failures, what are the lessons you can get from them? It’s important to have your own set of reminders since we all vary in different circumstances and aspects. It always pays to be introspective to your own narrative and experience still, even after absorbing a plethora of information and articles!

“COME INTO EXISTENCE” is the theme for 2018 that I have created myself after putting words, phrases and goals into my word bank and mind map.

“To dream and visualise and to feel and to write them down afterwards. To make them happen the next. Be grateful for what is there in the now.”

IMG_0121

IMG_0122 IMG_0123

I have a set of phrases and questions for the year that will be a guide for myself whether I am still on track with my vision. This is the part of “more structure” that has helped me remove clutter of thoughts and ideas in my mind into a mind map.

What are the gist of the goals you want to achieve for the year? Or at least one goal you want to start. Write a list of phrases that resonate with you and let it sit. After your break, get back to it. Choose a phrase and write the adjectives and things that you want your image / scenery of 2018 to be. 

_______

With all the noise and chatter in our mind and our surroundings, it pays to wrap up our year, ponder on our learnings and goals of whichever topic / aspect of our lives— a case of which we add to ourselves the sense of excitement + a sense of direction, all while we watch our written promises and ideas come into life and if not, maybe something else greater.

What are your answers to the questions?

Love and Light,

S.S.