Today, as I write this, marks the last day of my theme “In Transit”: A year in review. From the person I was in December 2015, I promised myself to try be more “in the moment” and make more of where I was, to travel (even the cheap thrills of 10-minute transit to Hidalgo), find my way to a tribe where I can stand for something and help reach that goal, write more, do the things I’m afraid to do for the fun of it and grow a satisfactory green thumb.
More often than not, a lot of times that these resolutions are not kept, nor disregarded at the end of the year, but for me, as long as small progress or the effort to do those things are done, step by step, it gradually builds up to a snowball that surprises you at the end of the year as you dissect every flake. To see the details beyond each snowflake is a more intimate peek at your year, to see every detail, emotion, scene and people who have made your year what it is. In this case, the end-result is a great merit, but the appreciation of the small details and process have already made it into “goodness” before you even acknowledge how massive the result was. Truly, everything comes by a mix of chance-surprise-the expected a.k.a. “mysterious mix” that gives life its zest.
So far, 2016 has blessed me with short notice trips to La Union, mountains in Rizal, Daraitan, frequent Hidalgo-Quiapo visit, stay for longer at my new second home and to try out my first ever job in a completely new place, did help and start establish a new organization to fuel appreciation and celebration for nationalism–with the vision of a close and good friend, Pam, finally getting a hang of commute (which was something “scary” to me), complete a Daykeeper to write my thoughts, feelings and intentions every week (which I was making excuses to not fill up from the one I had from 2015). And all the other extras I will not be able to finish a list of– getting an internship (by short notice again, but no regrets, at all), winning a contest, do well, unlearn and relearn ife through academics (some I didn’t even know why I was so worried all along), writing a heartfelt confession for my mid-year reflection and be unapologetically honest for a passion project I’m nervous and excited about.
But don’t get me wrong– this year hasn’t been the prettiest with its highlights, but also has marked the lowest of me. I was looking at my doubtful, restless self seeking for the blessings of my muses to push me to go through whatever rut I was. In another view, those days and feelings have pushed me harder to end on a brighter, beautiful note and thankful to have been faced with.
2016 already happened. It happened in a blink of an eye– together with its grace, movement and rough patches. Time to open and feast our senses for a new beginning.
Cheers to self-love, focus, and exploration for this coming year.
Love and light.
S.S., signing out.
camera play with the wind, cozying up on a new carpet and getting “bored” for the rest afternoon while writing this
A little video journal for the last quarter of the year: